Remembering...

The day I found out I was pregnant the first time my mom bought the baby a Noah's Ark book. She wrote the date on the back: July 21, 1999 and signed "Love Grandma." Our baby was due in March, but I miscarried about the 10th week. The little book from Grandma was torn apart by the boys quite some time ago and before I throw it away I decided to write down the date I found out I was pregnant. Also, I recently "blogged" the following on our Myspace:

Grieving --by Lori

We all heal in different ways. What is comforting to some may not be to others. Once, when my sister was grieving, I told her that God must believe her to be strong in order to handle the circumstances that she was dealing with. She told me, "That is not comforting!" It is always difficult to know what to say when someone else is hurting. At times I feel it is unfair for my life to continue as normal when someone else’s is turned upside down.

Today I received a call from a friend of my husband. He shared with me some heartbreaking news. After the call ended, I explained to my boys what had happened and prayed. But then, I finished cleaning the bathrooms. It seemed odd to me to be cleaning when a friend was hurting so badly.

Today’s events reminded me of a time when I was deeply hurting and what I found most comforting. I appreciated the flowers we received; it was a reminder that people cared. One girl, who happened to be mentally challenged, simply said, "I’m sorry about ----." That touched me; a simple "I’m sorry" that acknowledged my pain without any words of advice, encouragement or clichés.

When reading the scriptures, I found a passage that provided huge comfort. I have no idea if it would resonate with others like it did with me. John 11 tells of Lazarus being sick. Mary & Martha, his sisters, sent Jesus a message, "Lord, your dear friend is very sick." Jesus didn’t leave immediately to help His friend. He waited until Lazarus was dead. He knew that this sickness was for the purpose of glorifying God and Himself through the miracle of raising Lazarus from the dead. However, even though He was angry that His followers didn’t have more faith & even though He knew that Lazarus would live again, he still cried. The only reason I can think of for His tears is because it hurt Him to see others hurting. He knew there would be a happy ending, but the pain He saw Mary, Martha and others experiencing moved Him.

It was a huge comfort to me to picture a more emotional Jesus; a God who not only commands us to weep with those who weep, but a God that actually does it. For me, knowing that the Creator of the universe was crying WITH ME….that was a powerful. (4/3/08)

Luke

Luke is a fun little boy. He seems to remember the funniest things that he hears and uses them at just the right time. He also makes up interesting things as well. A few days ago, he was on the toilet when Cory was leaving for work. He wanted Cory to give him a kiss, but Cory was hesitant due to the job Luke was undertaking. Luke told Cory, "I don't poop with my lips." Cory and I both laughed and then Cory kissed Luke. (He is such a great dad!)

Zane the traveling man?

Zane likes to watch "Rick Steves' Europe" when he gets a chance. Recently, he was watching it at my parent's house and didn't get to finish the show because it was time to home. Evidently, he stewed about it during the 45 minute drive back to Eugene. While I was brushing his teeth he told me that he wished his brothers hadn't been born. (I don't remember him ever saying that before...) He was very sad, almost to the point of tears. I asked him why he said that and he told me, "Then we could travel like we use to." I didn't know we had done much traveling and told him we had only been to Florida and Idaho. I assured him that in a few years we would get to travel again and that I believe his brothers are worth the delay in our travel schedule. He still seemed so sad. I guess he has been bit by the travel bug. Maybe he will be the next Rick Steves!?

PS Cory just told me that Zane also likes to watch "Travels to the Edge."

Diamond Lake

Making smores. Yum!We were able to go boating and fishing. Luke caught the first two fish and then Zane caught one. (About 15" rainbow trout.) Cade didn't get to catch one...maybe next time.

Zane SWOLLEN with mosquito bites

I took this picture to try and show how swollen Zane's face is from mosquito bites. To me, he doesn't even look like himself because his forehead and the bridge of his nose are so swollen.

Playing in the dirt...

My boys LOVE playing in the dirt. Sometimes it is amazing how dirty they can get. This picture is ADORABLE, but it really DOESN'T capture just how dirty Cade is!

4th of July funnies

Yesterday, my cousin Ross was doing some crazy things on his four-wheeler. While watching him, Zane said, "I think we should call Ross, Ross The Amazing." Cade was yelling, "Go Ross! Go Ross!" Most of the women in the family were in some sort of panic. Ross' wife was fine; guess they must have a pretty decent life insurance policy on him!

On the way home from our 4th of July family picnic Cory asked Cade where Eugene was. He said Oregon (Zane and Luke told him the answer.) Then Cory asked him what is in Eugene, Oregon? Cory was trying to get him to realize that our home was in Eugene, but was very proud when Cade answered, "Football!"

Today, Luke asked Cory, "Do you know who we really get presents from?"
Cory responded that he didn't know and Luke said, "The guy who looks like Santa Tizer."
Cory told Luke that the correct name is Santa Claus and explained to him what "sanitizer" is.